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Saturday, October 1, 2011

Honeymooners...with Kids

Some parents go to great lengths not to fight in front of their kids. For others, it's Wrestlemania by the big bay window for all the neighborhood to see. Either way, I'm sure there's pros and cons to how it affects children's psyche. In my opinion, it's not the amount of fighting or not fighting parents have in front of their kids - it's how they resolve it.

In my household, the resolution is fairly easy - Mommy is always right.

Of course, Daddy is the worst offender of challenging that peace treaty and the boys will eagerly follow suit if I let him get away with it. But for the most part, they know what's good for them and will begrudgingly comply.

On the occasions I go ballistic, usually around that time of the month, I tend to explode at Daddy over a simple little thing like putting plastic dishware on the bottom rack of the dishwasher. Both boys watch silently and I know what's going through their minds. They're thinking, better you than me, dad. Perhaps in their eyes he's being a brave man but I've been in their shoes before. When I was a kid and my dad stepped over the line with my mother I thought, Gee dad, that was a stupid thing to say.

My four-year old has a better tactic. He'll say, "Don't make the mad face Mommy or you'll get wrinkles."

Not only does he diffuse the situation, he saves my forehead from being permanently engraved with angry lines. Smart for a little guy.

What I should commend my husband for is that he will apologize to me in front of the boys. My parents never reconciled after a fight - I think they held a grudge against each other from the moment I was born the wrong gender.

I often smile at the term, "The honeymoon is over," because I'm too old to believe in honeymoon's now. If I get vaguely excited over anything, I just think how Angelina Jolie might catch wind of my happiness and f*ck it up for me because she seems to hate happy people.

My husband and I are way past the honeymoon stage. We're at that comfortable stage of familiarity as Ralph and Alice Kramden were. They never had kids despite the fact that they had no distractions like cable in the bedroom. I guess, it's as if the audience were the kids watching their bickering. Perhaps it was all the brilliant talent of Jackie Gleason, or the writing or the times but it was so entertaining to watch. So considering I grew up with "The Honeymooners" midnight showings for my entire teenage years, it's safe to say, they did alright by the Russo's.


  1. I like your resolution tactic. We should try that around here.

    I agree, Angelina Jolie does seem to hate happy people. And cheeseburgers. Cheeseburgers and happy people.

  2. Can I copy paste this resolution tactic too? We have a slightly different demographic though, dear husband as the only male in the household so most of the times I delegate the scare tactic to him. We rarely argue but when we do we say sorry in front of the kids too.

  3. It works great - even if you're wrong and Google can prove it. On those rare occasions, I might make it up by grilling him a cheeseburger.