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Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Used Uterus Day

Seven years - that's how long I've been a mother. To me, it feels as if I've been one all my life. There was a time before it - and then there's now. That's it.

To tell you honestly, life is simpler. But that's what happens when you have a clear purpose for living and that is, doing everything to ensure little people don't die. My still-single girlfriends use me as a reminder not to go the raise-a-family route. You can't blame them - I mean, just look at me. My hair needs mowing, my Franken-jeans are appalling and my eyebrows are bushier than Donald Trump's!

But it's these moments that make me swell with joy (and beer might also have something to do with it):

The Communal Bone. We don't have dogs, so we let the boys clean their teeth with it. They've been working on it since Sunday night. In their defense, it was a fantastic rib eye steak.

Then there's the Fortune Cookie that came with Monday night's Chinese dumplings. Samu cracked it open and said, "Oh, yay! Coupons!"

My fortune says I should learn to read!
Should you be working on Mother's Day cards with the help of your mother? Well, who else knows how to spell "appreciate" - Daddy?
Mistaking a greeting for an essay
So the count down to Mother's day begins, because no one is exempt. We may not all be mothers but we certainly came from one. Besides, not matter how nice she is, she'll never, ever, ever let us forget that we occupied her uterus once...and left mess.

14 comments:

  1. Well, who else knows how to spell "appreciate" - Daddy?
    - great line

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hey...thanks for the Mother's Day reminder, Namzola! My wife's birthday, our wedding anniversary and Mother's Day are three days I never, ever overlook.

    O yeah, bushy eyebrows are sort of cool.... Now hairy legs are another story.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When hairy legs are in - I'm SO there!

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  3. Good point. Noah just learned what a uterus is in the "class video" two days ago. I'm going to let him know how much he screwed mine up with his feet and head and stuff.

    ~The G is Silent

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's what Mother's Day is all about - in my worthless opinion.

      Delete
  4. Used uterus and you left a mess? I love you. I wish I could leave comments and funny for you as you leave for me. But I can't, thanks for being my friend anyway.

    Cheers to saggy mom's with bad hair!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What are you talking about? You're a laugh-riot! Saggy Moms Rule.

      Delete
  5. Hear hear on the USED uterus!! Hahaha! These 3 pictures are just hilarious! I love you how write about your 3 boys Nami. Again the captions blew me away. AGAIN! Hahahaha!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hope you didn't get blown too far - you have to come back, you know.

      Delete
  6. Hope your Used Uterus Day was the best yet!
    I laughed out loud at the fortune cookie coupons. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Actually, I could use Fortune coupons more than inane Asian-sounding advice!

      Delete
  7. This scares me because I have terrible jeans and bushy eyebrows now- before children. How insane am I going to look after? lol

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    Replies
    1. You'll probably go the opposite route and become Ms. Fashionista with matching baby.

      Delete

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