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Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Kidnapping And Potatoes

A group of children stood in line boarding their school bus. One mother placed her son in line, turned around and made her way back to the sidewalk to watch the school bus go. Everything seemed normal. She never suspected that her son hadn't boarded the bus. She found out later on that somewhere in between her leaving him in line and the bus' departure, he had been abducted.

It was the "every-parents-nightmare" that happened to one of our neighbors when I was a kid. Sadly, he was never found, as far as I know. How the child was taken was a mystery but knowing how it happened wouldn't change the fact that it did. Nor would it ever abate the constant concern of a parent that their child could be kidnapped anywhere, anytime.

Because of that experience, I might be overly cautious about keeping the boys in view but I can't imagine it's by much. The times they run off far enough to push my panic button, they know what to expect after I catch up. Huffing and puffing, I go Full Metal Jacket on them. The boys look at me as if I'm a coupon distributor in a chicken suit and vow they'll never do it again.

But they forget their vows as time goes on and I'm chasing them down the block once again.

They run, I yell "freeze," they ignore me and before I know it, I'm sprinting with three knapsacks and bag of potatoes. It's like being in some kind of absurd Olympic sport but at least this has a goal - I can't figure out the point of Curling.

So the last time, I had to do the pound-of-potatoes-run, it seemed to me that the consequences of running out of view were not effectively striking a chord. I mean the idea of abduction, kidnapping, being taken away - may sound scary to a child but like the boogey man the reality is limited to their imagination. I've used the "you'll never see Mommy or Daddy again," line but realized that depending on our popularity rating at the time, that could sound like a vacation.

I took it a step further and asked, "Do you know what kidnappers do to children after they take them?"

They both pondered in silence.

"Put them in the trunk of a car," one of my boys guessed.

It was a good guess but not scary enough. If an idiot of a woman winds up on Youtube for stashing three kids in the trunk with the penalty of a ticket, then apparently this act is more entertaining than terrifying.

And then I thought of the rash of kidnappings at a new Asian super center about ten years ago. Shoppers flocked from all over - they fought for parking spaces, shopping carts - it was a mad house. And it was the perfect mix of mayhem to steal children. Kids between three and five perusing in the aisles were simply escorted to the bathroom where their clothes were changed, their hair spray painted a different color and the kidnappers simply walked out with them under the surveillance cameras. The only article of clothing that could not be swapped were their shoes. Made me wonder if kids shoes could be installed with a homing device.

But getting back to being stuffed in the trunk of a car, my answer was, "Yeah, no. Kidnappers don't just put you in the trunk of their car. They do much, much worse."

At this point, both boys gave me their full attention. Amazing how a little gore and terror can spike a boy's interest.

Without giving them details, they were told that many children who are abducted die very lonely deaths that are worse than any nightmare they've ever had.

"Now, do you want that to happen to you?" I asked.

"No," they solemnly replied.

We walked in silence. I hoped it was the last time we would have to have this talk about them running out of view. Even if they remain in sight, abduction is a parental paradox that will never truly be out of view. After all, how can I expect my four-year old to understand that it's okay to say good morning to the school crossing guard, if I'm also telling him not to talk to strangers?

Predators who feed on children have their bait down so perfectly, that the only way a kid is going to have enough street smarts to weed them out, is to actually encounter one. That scares me. But in hindsight, it's how I learned. Believe me, if you think I was scared then, I'm even more disturbed by it now. Counter in the fact that a majority of kidnappings are usually committed by people the victims knew, and I'm ready to ask for a background check with every "nice-to-meet-you".

For the time being, I'm just not buying a pound of potatoes until I know for sure that the "Silence Of The Lambs" lecture thoroughly soaked in.

1 comment:

  1. I get so incredibly scared about it and I live in a quiet suburb ...but in my eyes those are probably the perfect settings parents trust the neighbors and know everyone on the block... So they let the kids play out alone...well not this crazy mom...Tyler may play in the back yard alone with the dogs out with him but when he plays in the front I pull up a chair and watch and read but mostly watch and all the other kids well I watch them too and I can tell you every time we have a new neighbor or someone has a new car because I watch... I am just so scared of the bad that can happen ... but we still have fun ...he ran off one time in Target and I am pretty sure I scared the pee out of him because he has never tried again